Think about your closest friend for a moment. Are you the one who loves a crowded party while they'd rather spend Friday night at home? Or, maybe you're always running late, while they're the person who arrives ten minutes early.

Some of our favorite people are nothing like us. And, according to new research, that might be exactly the point.

We Might Not Be as Alike as We Think

To find out, researchers at Michigan State University asked nearly 1,500 people to take a closer look at their friendships. Participants were organized into groups of four friends. Everyone described their own personality and offered their impressions of the others.

The research gave scientists a chance to compare how similar friends really were, and whether those similarities had anything to do with how happy they were together. They focused on five familiar personality traits:

• Extraversion: How outgoing and sociable someone is

• Agreeableness: How cooperative and considerate they tend to be

• Conscientiousness: How organized and responsible they are

• Emotional stability: How they generally handle negative emotions

• Openness: How interested they are in new experiences and ideas

What they discovered might surprise anyone who believes the best friendships are built on having everything in common.

Our Friends Aren't Necessarily Our Twins

Friends did share some personality traits, although the similarities were generally small. The biggest overlap involved openness, which makes sense when we think about how friendships develop. People who enjoy trying new activities may naturally find themselves spending time together.

But extraversion was different. The researchers didn't find a significant similarity in how outgoing friends were. So, that friendship between the enthusiastic social butterfly and the quiet homebody isn't an unusual combination.

Even more interesting, the participants tended to believe they were more similar to their friends than their personality ratings suggested. Perhaps we see a little more of ourselves in the people we love.

Being Alike Didn't Mean Being Happier

The researchers found no evidence that matching personalities led to greater satisfaction within a friendship. Instead, certain personality traits were more closely associated with how happy participants were in their relationships.

People had higher satisfaction when they viewed their friends as agreeable and conscientious. In everyday terms, having a thoughtful and dependable friend may be more important than having one with a matching personality. 

It seems the participants' impressions of their friends' personalities were more connected to friendship satisfaction than the friends' own personality ratings.

What Does This Mean for Our Friendships?

This study primarily involved young adults, most of whom were women. So, the findings might look different among older friends or people from different backgrounds.

Researchers also collected information at one point in time, so they couldn't determine how these friendships developed or whether people’s personalities became more similar over the years.

And the study focused on personality traits, not whether friends shared important values or beliefs.

Good Friends Don't Have to Be Carbon Copies

We probably don't need a personality questionnaire to appreciate the people around us. A friend who approaches life differently might introduce us to new experiences we'd never have chosen ourselves. And someone who doesn't share our enthusiasm for a particular hobby can still be the person we enjoy spending time with.

This research offers a lovely reminder that a satisfying friendship doesn't require two matching personalities. So, if your best friend is your complete opposite, don’t worry. Just enjoy the fact that you have a good thing going.

Looking for stories that inform and engage? From breaking headlines to fresh perspectives, WaveNewsToday has more to explore. Ride the wave of what’s next.